Before my girlfriend was my girlfriend and I had no idea whether she might want to be my girlfriend, we would go to the movies. We were trying to see every Oscar nominated movie and also trying to navigate the brinksmanship of a mutual crush. It was fun.

One night when we went to the movies, she had a plant with her that she had picked up after work. She was trying to buy more plants for her apartment, which I thought was cool.

Plants are good for an apartment. They add an air of someone lives and spends time here to a place. I also think it’s good practice for an adult to keep something alive and plants are great when you don’t have time for a pet or, like, a child.

One night when a bunch of friends were hanging out at her apartment, she pointed to a plant and said, “I picked up that one for you.” It was, she told me, an Algerian Ivy and it was in a clay pot. I thought, okay, that’s a sign, right? I took it home and put it in my front window.

The Algerian Ivy needs warmth and sunlight and my front window, at the time the plant was given to me, had very little of either.

I killed it.

When a plant starts to die, it’s dark. It’s like watching a car crash in slow motion. A few leaves at the bottom start to wilt, then they get brown and brittle, then they fall off. And then it spreads slowly up the branches, leaf after leaf like the slow and inexorable march of zombies. Finally, what you’re left with are a couple of bare branches sticking up from the dirt like a little apocalypse in a pot on your window sill.

Sap that I am, I was left with the thought that I have killed the plant this woman bought for me and what does that say about us?

It turns out – nothing. “Yeah, you have to kill a few plants before you get the hang of it,” she said.

Cool.

The day before my birthday, we were walking through Gowanus when we happened upon a plant store. We went in and saw a display of “tough plants” or “hard to kill” or something to that effect. They existed in low to medium light and without constant watering. She bought me a Calathea plant and it has been going strong for over a month now.

I geek out on stuff. Sports teams. Bands. Authors. I am currently geeking out on plants.

I ordered plants from The Sill from the beginner section, or ease of care, something to that effect. I’ve been buying pots for them. I ordered planters from West Elm because that’s where adults get home accessories.

My geek out phases come and go. I truly hope I keep these alive, though. At the very least I hope I keep that Birthday calathea alive. Yeah, you have to kill a few before you get it right but I like that one.